Sunday, July 20, 2008

Job Reviews

Job reviews are unlike any reviews known to human kind, as all workers will attest to... fess up, you know what I am saying is the truth.

Movie Reviews are rated on the star system. Four Stars = hit. One Star = 'da bomb. Restaurant Reviews are rated on the knife, spoon, fork system. Four of any one knife, spoon or fork = lines around the block and reservations well into the next millennium. One knife, spoon or fork = site of new parking lot....

The worse type of job review is the "Self-Appraisal". It is a lot like Russian Roulette... wonder if this dish will run away with a knife, spoon or fork????

As I prepare to fill in the blanks I am trying to find just the right words to convey that I am very much a team player without seeming to be the whole team. Hopefully if done correctly I could be awarded anywhere from 1% to 3% more money or as much as 6 cents an hour more.... Oh be still my heart... at this rate I will make the "high rollers" league in another 100 years!

You are handed these pages and asked to evaluate yourself. Too glowing and you chance being looked at as braggart with a bag of hot air going for you. Too modest and you chance being looked at as filled with false modesty and fishing for complements. It is a total No Win situation!

Wish me luck... if you don't see or hear from me you'll know one of two things... I didn't get any % and could no longer afford the luxury of Internet access, or, I got the 3% and am out celebrating... Anyone know where you can get a 6 cent beer?